French president: Hey, maybe Obama is a nutjob

Heh.

A new report circulating in the Kremlin today authored by France’s Directorate-General for External Security (DGSE) and recently “obtained” by the FSB shockingly quotes French President Nicolas Sarkozy [photo top right with Obama] as stating that President Barack Obama is “a  dangerous[ly] aliéné”, which translates into his, Obama, being a “mad lunatic”, or in the American vernacular, “insane”.

Dude, the Frogs are insulting our president!  The friggin’ Frogs!  Hey, I’m not saying that he’s wrong or that I object.  I’m just saying…the Frogs!

Bizarre story of the day, “French gay soccer team” edition

Isn’t “French” and “gay” redundant?  I mean, “Not that there’s anything wrong with that!”  😆  Excerpt:

A French gay soccer team says its members were victims of homophobia when a team of Muslim players refused to play a match against them.

The Paris Foot Gay team says Tuesday it received an e-mail from the Creteil Bebel club canceling a match scheduled for last Sunday.

“Because of the principles of our team, which is a team of devout Muslims, we can’t play against you,” the e-mail said, according to Paris Foot Gay. The e-mail received Saturday said, “Our convictions are much more important than a simple football match.”

Exit question #1: Is there a designated “straight” soccer team?

Exit question #2: Since when was sexual preference a descriptor of a soccer team?

French talk trash, then promptly lose

A French loss (at anything) is pretty much expected these days.  Still, the Frogs don’t know when to keep their traps shut.  From Weasel Zippers:

The French never miss an opportunity to disgrace themselves….

The Americans’ relay victory was all the more sweet considering the way France declared itself the favorite prior to the Olympics. The Frenchmen weren’t shy about repeating it either. In a news conference prior to the start of the Games, Bernard, who boasts a tattoo of a shark on his abdomen, was asked what he thought about his country’s chances against the United States.

“The Americans?” Bernard said. “We will smash them.”

Several of Bernard’s teammates followed his lead, even going to far as to suggest that the Americans were scared of the French.

“This morning, Bob (Bowman) had said the French was saying some stuff, talking a little bit of trash,” Phelps said. “It fired me up more than anything else. I told Garret, and he said ‘You know what?’ We’re going to let our swimming do the talking.”

Rest here>>>>

C’est dommage, Frenchie!  Hey, I’ll give them this: at least they tried, instead of surrendering!  😆

French think that nearly 100 million jihadis no big whoop

Considering the Frogs are known for their well-honed surrender techniques, this should come as no surprise.  But Abe Greenwald tears them a new one:

A new Gallup poll is being touted as a “challenge” to western misperceptions of Islam. The survey was done on three continents and took six years to complete, and as the French news agency AFP reports, we’ve all been a little alarmist over here: “About 93 percent of the world’s 1.3 billion Muslims are moderates and only seven percent are politically radical, according to the poll, based on more than 50,000 interviews.”

Seven percent of 1.3 billion leaves us with . . . 91 million radical Islamists. And to think we were concerned! That piddling handful is nothing that can’t be taken care of with a little dialogue, a few billion in American aid, and some proper education. I’m feeling audaciously hopeful.

But, wait, what’s this? “The radicals are better educated, have better jobs, and are more hopeful with regard to the future than mainstream Muslims,” said John Esposito, who authored the book Who Speaks for Islam.

Oh well.

One shouldn’t cherry-pick facts to fit an agenda. The study does say that radicals “believe in democracy even more than many of the mainstream moderates do.” But does anyone really think we’re operating with a consistent definition of democracy here? The Muslim Brotherhood, for example, makes claims to be democratic, yet its leaders-for-life are not elected, the organization boasts a doctrine of female subordination, and it calls for the death of apostates. Kind of a big-government democracy, I suppose.

Dalia Mogahed, Esposito’s co-author, says, “A billion Muslims should be the ones that we look to, to understand what they believe, rather than a vocal minority.” How right she is. We need to find out from one billion rational human beings why they largely refuse to stand up for humanity and dignity instead of cowering in the face of fascist thugs. They’re the only Westerners this study challenges. 

Freakin’ Frogs.

Sarkozy swears at heckler

While some Euros are getting their knickers in a wad, people like me enjoy it when Sarkozy lays the smack down on a Frog heckler.  Story:

A video of French President Nicolas Sarkozy telling a bystander to “get lost” has become a hit on the Internet.

Sarkozy was filmed by a journalist from the daily Le Parisien on a walkabout at the annual farm fair in Paris on Saturday.

Sarkozy offered his hand to a man who said: “Don’t touch me, you are soiling me.” In reply, Sarkozy said, without dropping his smile: “Get lost, dumb ass.” 

Presidential-like?  No.  Called for?  Absolutely.

French MSM “news” story is recycled two-year-old Dem talking points!

But hey, since it lets the Frogs call the surge a failure, then what’s a little tardiness, right?  From Confederate Yankee:

Agence France-Presse (AFP) the oldest news agency in the world and the largest French news agency, has been caught recycling two-year-old Congressional subcommittee testimony as current news.
…
What AFP neglected to mention is that the quotes from Professor Hoffman were issued in written testimony to The House Armed Services Subcommittee on Terrorism, Unconventional Threats and Capabilities in February of 2006. The testimony can be found in a PDF document published at the RAND Corporation web site on page 5 and a “dowdified” quote from the bottom of page 5 and the top of page 6.

This written testimony was issued eleven months before President Bush proposed the “surge” of American troops into Iraq, almost eleven months before General David Petraeus was confirmed as the new Commanding General, Multi-National Force – Iraq, and a full year prior to the beginning of the buildup of American forces beginning in February of 2007 as part of the new Strategy for Iraq.

The AFP article, written in present tense, in no way indicated that it was citing obsolete information as current news.

The information is so obsolete as to render the article itself as fraudulent in nature. Agence France-Presse should immediately retract this article, and explain how such “journalism” ever made it to press.

Non, monsieur…pas de “liberal media bias”!

French deplore…jogging?

I swear, the Frogs have become a walking, talking, surrendering parody! Observe:

President Sarkozy has fallen foul of intellectuals and critics who see his passion for jogging as un-French, right-wing and even a ploy to brainwash his citizens.

Attacks on Mr Sarkozy’s pastime, which he has made a symbol of his presidency, began on the internet as soon as he bounded up the steps of the Elysée Palace in shorts when he took office in May. That moment has become the icon of his hyperenergetic administration. The grumbling has now moved to television and the press.

“Is jogging right wing?” wondered Libération, the left-wing newspaper. Alain Finkelkraut, a celebrated philosopher, begged Mr Sarkozy on France 2, the main state television channel, to abandon his “undignified” pursuit. He should take up walking, like Socrates, Arthur Rimbaud, the poet, and other great men, said Mr Finkelkraut.

“Western civilisation, in its best sense, was born with the promenade. Walking is a sensitive, spiritual act. Jogging is management of the body. The jogger says I am in control. It has nothing to do with meditation.”

Mr Sarkozy’s habit infuriates his critics – and some supporters – because he flaunts it so hard. …

I don’t even know what else to say, since I think this absurdity just kind of speaks for itself. I mean, French jokes are so easy to make, yet here they are just begging to be mocked yet again. Oh, well, I guess we should oblige them and mock to our hearts’ content.

AndrewR at Ace of Spades wonders thusly:

I may be missing the point of all this, but I think what they’re trying to say is that all the fat, lazy Americans who don’t exercise and weigh themselves with livestock scales are really…progressives?

Satire alert: Belgium to pick up France’s slack

Bookmark The Nose on Your Face now, or I’ll replace the whole blog with a single page that reads repeated “All work and no play makes Jonathan a dull boy” a la The Shining. From TNOYF:

Long resigned to their role as the “Garfunkel” of the international punchline community, Belgium has seen their stock rise sharply on the news of the recent French presidential election. Nicolas Sarkozy’s vocal pro-American stance, along with his large margin of victory, may shift the balance of French-bashing away from the traditional favorites; the French.

“I have to be honest with you, I’m not all that familiar with the Belgians,” said Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania resident James Dyer. “But I better get up to speed quickly; they certainly aren’t going to just mock themselves. This election is a wake-up call for many of us in the France-mocking community, and we ignore the will of the people at our own peril.”

Dyer went on to say that although he does not know a great deal about Belgians, he does have some generic taunts “that can be utilized until more specific ones can be crafted.”

Experts say that more than anything, this election was a referendum on the cliched French taunting that has become prevalent in recent years.

“The French have given us so much material for so long, that it became almost too easy to mock them,” said veteran Francophobe Jack O’Malley. “Surrender, crepes, effeminate males, the f***ing beret? Comedy gold. I think that many people, myself included, have become complacent, lazy. On another note, let me be the first to welcome the gay, John Ritter-adoring, waffle-vendors of Belgium into their new role. You’ll be hearing from us.”

Headline: "Sarkozy holidays as fresh violence hits French cities"

From the French al-Reuters, AFP:

President-elect Nicolas Sarkozy relaxed and strategised Tuesday on a luxury yacht in the Mediterranean, while back home “anti-Sarko” protests rumbled on into a third consecutive night.

OK, I’ll bite: since he’s the president-elect and thus not the acting president, just what in the name of escargot is he supposed to or expected to do? Continuing:

Sarkozy boarded the vessel in Malta with his wife Cecilia and their 10-year-old son Louis on Monday at the start of a three-day break to relax after the right-winger’s emphatic weekend election victory.

Not “conservative”, but the more loaded term “right-winger”. Nope, no liberal media bias!

OK, how about this gem?

Sarkozy, a tough-talking former interior minister, is hated in the high-immigrant suburbs after he described young delinquents as “rabble” and for his stance on law and order.

He’s hated by “immigrants” (that’s P.C.-speak for “Muslims”) for “his stance on law enforcement”? In other words, his stance on law enforcement is that he’s for it. You know, laws should be enforced and stuff? I know, that’s just heartless, unfair, cruel, and bigoted!

France elects conservative, rejects socialist

Maybe there’s hope for the Frogs yet. From the Boob…er, Beeb:

Conservative candidate Nicolas Sarkozy has won the hotly-contested French presidential election.
The final count gave Mr Sarkozy 53.06%, compared with 46.94% for socialist Segolene Royal, with turnout at 85%.

Mr Sarkozy, 52, the son of a Hungarian immigrant, takes over from the 74-year-old Jacques Chirac.

Riot police have fired tear gas at a small group of demonstrators who were protesting in central Paris against Mr Sarkozy’s victory.

I see the Democrats have made their way to Paris! Anywho, good news and bad news resulted from the victory. Good news…

He said the US could count on France’s friendship…

…and bad news…

but urged Washington to take a lead in the fight against climate change.

Oh, well, nobody’s perfect. Finally, this caught my attention:

But the BBC’s Caroline Wyatt in Paris says he will have to work hard to unite the French, and try to win round those who voted against him.

Why? Seriously, why does he have to win over those who voted against him? He had a mandate, having both a majority and a near 7% margin of victory. Those who voted against him can continue to oppose him (much as those of us who voted against Democrats last year will be doing), or they can give him a chance. Sure, working for common ground in and of itself is noble and probably a good idea from a political practicality standpoint, but I disagree that it is incumbent upon Sarkozy to “reach out” to those who oppose him.

By the way, the Socialists are in disarray after their third straight defeat. From the Financial Times:

Let the finger-pointing begin. Ségolène Royal’s defeat on Sunday night left the French Socialist party in disarray and searching for someone to blame. There is hardly a shortage of scapegoats.

It is the party’s third consecutive presidential defeat. The Socialists now face the question of whether they can ever regain power without ditching their anti-capitalist rhetoric, as the mainstream left has done across almost all of Europe.
…
”The left is not credible on so many issues (yeah, no kidding! – Ed.), from the 35-hour working week to immigration and law and order,” says Dominique Reynié, professor at Sciences Po university.

“It is the fault of the left collectively. Ever since their [parliamentary election] defeat in 1983 they have never questioned their fundamental ideology, only thinking they needed to change tactics,” he says.

Well, that was the American left’s approach for so many years, too: hide your true beliefs and focus on tactics, not the message. That approach always failed until 2006, when (as a result of Iraq, spending, and immigration, among other things) the tactic finally paid off. The approach has yet to pay off in France, though.

Perhaps France will finally return to relevancy on the international stage. Only time will tell.

Kerry’s new job?

Yo, John…I hear there’s an opening for which you are supremely qualified! From al-Reuters:

French President Jacques Chirac is expected to confirm that he will not stand for re-election when he appears on television on Sunday, marking the end of a political career spanning more than four decades.

Just think: French president Jean-François Heinz-Kerry (who is rumored to have served in Vietnam) could finally pass his “global test“!

The French are at it again

Can’t the Frogs figure out a way to stop making themselves the butt of the world’s jokes? Guess not. From AFP:

One of France’s leading hosiery makers is launching a new line for men next month — pantyhose with a welcome front opening and big feet, available in thick mannish knit but also as sheer tights.

Gerbe, which is based in eastern France, said this week that the country’s first hosiery line for men would go on sale in March “due to increasing demand from male clients.”

The pantyhose comes with a larger belt than for women as well as an opening, with “Men opaque”, “sheer” or “satin” available in four models of tights, with and without feet, and three models of feel-good knee-high hosiery made to help drain toxins and massage tired limbs.

Internet users on a French fashion messaging board, http://www.ctendance.com/forum2, responded with a touch of scepticism. “Why create pantyhose for men when women’s tights are fine?” said one. Tights are unisex,” said another, “except that women’s are always softer.”

There you go, Pierre: why use men’s pantyhose when you can just wear women’s tights instead? Sometimes, words just totally fail me.